jademonster42:

vannpires:

what month comes after september???

halloween

after that, at 61 days, is the longest month of the year, christmas


e-zekiel:

okay so today I was at the mall and this girl walking in front of me and tripped and fell and instead of helping her up like a normal person would- I decided to make her feel less embarrassed and fall down too

but I guess another guy had the same idea because we fell at the same time

and then another person fell

and another

and suddenly I was lying in the middle of an impromptu fainting mob and a lot of people were shouting

and the girl who’d originally fallen looked so fucking happy


davegrohlsfacialhair:

i recommend the creme brulee

image

i recommend you go away

image



standardgaydad:

u know u fucked up when u still haven’t slept yet and u hear birds chirping outside


"TRY ME"
— somebody you do not wanna try (via blackproverbs)


que-mystery:

arabellesicardi:

"text me when you get home" means "i love you, be safe." 

It really does


  • drive thru guy: bye have a nice day
  • me: bye i love you

posted 1 day ago with 5,808 notesnimcks)

prinsasslou:

at 2:10 Harry takes a quick peak at the interviewers boobs

image

then looks at Niall

image

then the camera turns to him

image

then he realizes he’s being filmed

image

im laughign so hard they can’t be sly for shit

posted 1 day ago with 110,194 notesclayur)

When you’re in first place in Mario Kart and shit starts going down behind you:

sodomymcscurvylegs:

image


  • iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
  • Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
  • iPhone user: I just like this pho-
  • Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*
posted 1 day ago with 102,055 notesrhyse)

"Cause you never think that the last time is the last time. You think there will be more. You think you have forever, but you don’t."
— Meredith Grey, Grey’s Anatomy (via satans-ghost)

"Date someone who would rather watch your favorite movie with you then go to a party on Friday night. Date someone who will share their food with you even though you said you didn’t want any. Date someone who will warm your hands in the winter and kiss your pink nose. Date someone who will text you they love you at 2am and at 9pm. Date someone who will let you change the station in the car when they’re driving. Date someone who can make you smile when you would rather die. Date someone who makes your insides feel like you’ve just downed a bottle of vodka. Date someone who makes you better."
— Unknown (via psych-facts)